The past few days I have been caught up in an experience that was so humbling and a huge reality check. For the last couple of months I have been such an advocate of being grateful even in times of trouble and never forgetting to count your blessings. I have tried to offer my best bits of advice to friends going through immensely difficult trials. I just recently was put to the test of practicing everything I preached and I can attest to the fact that it is so much easier said than done. But it is so worth it. The amount of energy that it takes to make yourself happy and make yourself miserable is exactly the same. This doesn't mean you're not allowed to cry or be human but it does mean that you have to keep trying even when the odds seem against you. 
I heard a little metaphor somewhere that you have to "fill your fridge". If your fridge is empty and somebody comes along to offer you a crusty gross old slice of pizza you'll take it because thats all you have and all you think you can get. If you, however, have a full fridge with fresh strawberries and delicious parfaits you will not accept (or even desire for) the crusty gross old slice of pizza that is offered to you. You can not have your entire metaphorical fridge filled by somebody else- you have to be accountable for the majority of things that you put in it. You have to set goals of all levels of magnitude and accomplish them. You have to serve others. You have to keep your feelings and your self worth in two separate places because when somebody hurts your feelings it shouldn't make you feel any less about yourself. I am so beyond grateful for a fridge that is constantly being filled with good things. I am also so beyond grateful that even though I'm trying my hardest to fill my own fridge, I still have others to hand deliver parfaits and delicious things for my fridge. I truly don't know what I would do without my mom to curl up next to in bed when I'm scared half to death about what the future holds, my best friends to support me and remind me of my own words, my Savior and Heavenly Father who have a plan for me and will assure my blessings as long as I try my best, and for the people that are worth begging and pleading for. 
I turned in my final college application tonight and can't help but reflect on my high school experience and all the many things that I have learned (writing those essays really got me in the mood hah!). There are so many ways that high school can go wrong and I am forever grateful for the many friends that have been there to make it go right. With that said I'm grateful for all of these things listed too. 
A grateful heart is a magnet for miracles and I have no doubt about that.

11/30- second chances, being humbled and realizing the amount of people that love me unconditionally, a bright future no matter what
11/29- church, leaders bringing cookies, moms bed
11/28- photo shoots, good Christmas tree farms, striped turtlenecks
11/27- Black Friday deals, Gabrielle as my shopping buddy, fluffy hand knit blankets
11/26- an incredible thanksgiving, my countless blessings and charmed life
11/25- that summerlin literally covers the entire city in Christmas lights, Apple TV, Hannah Leavitt
11/24- the Laws, blog playlists, random appreciation texts from friends
11/23- opportunities to serve, the Holy Ghost, Empty studios at color me mine
11/22- zions youth, Madelyn Fischer, Jacob's grandmas
11/21- Christmas wreaths on my neighborhood gate, Corbin Ballard, not working the weekend 
11/20- 8 months, ghiradelli hot chocolate, summerlin parkway
11/19- the hunger games, great friends/ great memories, banana republic turtle becks
11/18- real friends, the fact that my phone still works despite its little plunge, chocolate
11/17- Emma park, productive days, deep conditioner that makes my hair very soft
11/16- Jacob for putting up with my bratty moods, such a great boss, Savannah doing the hardest part of group projects
11/15- old pictures, Jacobs singles ward, the thousands of views on Elder Harts video
11/14- girls nights, profound thoughts, adorable babies
11/13- blog coding help websites, when Jacob wears sweaters, being thankful, my patriarchal blessing
11/12- my dad, prayers, heavenly fathers kindness towards me 
11/11- the cutlers, my camera, sushi taste testing
11/10- Haugen creative workshop, home made pies, my talents
11/9- the leavitts (for buying my last minute student council fundraiser candles), mom, dad
11/8- when blog designing goes as planned, sleeping in, ni-quil
11/7- movie dates at Elizas, good babysitting jobs, cough drops
11/6- good friends to help me realize how lucky I am, Elizas nordstroms cafe runs, seeing Jacob before his race 
11/5- hot showers, Jacobs homemade soup, greys anatomy 
11/4- Bishop Leavitt, baking 400 cookies at suzies house, my journal 
11/3- drive in movies, friends with boyfriends, early stages of Christmas decorations 
11/2- "date night", Hannah as my shopping buddy, a sweet little sister 
11/1- Lauren Richen's life lessons, Pinterest, the city that I am lucky to live in

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